Right now, as we squeak, Britain is hosting the XXX Olympic Games. People – and rodents – from around the globe have converged on London’s city streets (and, er, sewers) to celebrate camaraterie and engage in friendly competition. Along with this comes quite a confusion of dialect, and just as you humans can’t understand foreign languages, we rats, as crazy as it sounds, can’t distinguish foreign squeaks.
For example, who knows the squeak for cheese in Chinese? Who’s able to order sludge in Swahili? It’s been fleadiculously confusing beneath these London city streets!
What we need is a linguistic cheese wiz. A rat who knows every squeak in the world, who can translate in any tongue, any language, even with paws (because some of the rodent visitors are deaf) – indeed, a Native Squeaker!
Well, with more than 200 countries represented at these Olympic Games it’s unlikely we’ll find a critter capable of knowing everyone’s squeaks. Hmm … solution #2: chew through the humans’ translation cables, rewire them for rat lingo, and string ’em through the sewers along the London Underground – Brits are afraid to go underneath there anyway!
Keepinʼ it squeak,